![]() Getting over the fact that he now has to spend the rest of his existence as a leathery member of the undead remarkably quickly, Gramps relays stories of the old west with his enraptured great great grandson but also takes time out to also drop some exposition about the magical powers the crystal skull contains. Before you can say “Indiana Jones 4”, Jesse and Charlie are digging up “gramp’s” grave looking for the sparkly item only to find a resurrected zombie Gramps who was expecting to be rejuvenated when revived with the skull. Being the thoughtful type, Jesse looks into the history of his unique abode and discovers it was build by his great great grandfather Jesse (who he was named after) and that old photos of him and his nefarious partner Slim Razor show him holding a mysterious crystal skull. Jesse and his music producer girlfriend move into his gigantic ancestral home that he’s never actually seen ever since his parents were murdered when he was a baby and they are soon gate crashed by Jesse’s douche bag best buddy Charlie who is trying to get a record deal for his latest floozy. ![]() The first House – an inventive, above average flick from Steve Miner – shoved a war traumatised horror author into a struggle with the rubbery ghouls that lurked within his aunt’s home in order to retrieve his abducted son and paired a semi-serious story with actual stakes with outlandish set pieces and Norm from Cheers, but the sequel decided to go it’s own route by introducing a new house and new characters while neglecting to add any actual horror while it went about it… Get it right and you’ll reach the dizzying heights of the smart snark of Scream, the revisionist sniggers of An American Werewolf In London or the prat-falling belly laughs of Evil Dead 2 get it wrong and the best case scenario you’ll get is the quaint, shapeless mass that is House II: The Second Story – a film whose greatest joke is in it’s very subtitle… Nailing the tone is essential and unless you know exactly what ratio of scares to smiles you’re aiming for you are all but guaranteed to leave an unmoved audience neither amused or alarmed. The horror comedy is a tough bugger to pull off, make no mistake.
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